Obscene Paragraphs—Soot Bull Jeepers Edition

Now it gets scary.

Il Douché is now engaged in a nuclear game of chicken with North Korea’s Kim Jong-un,  possibly the only leader who matches him for impulsive lunacy. Their foreign policies can both be reduced to “There’s only room on this planet for one egomaniacal man-toddler with nuclear arms, and it’s me!”

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Up until now, most of what Il Douché did (or tried to do) could be reversed. We could rejoin the Paris Climate Accords when a saner person occupies the Oval Office; Obamacare remains the law of the land, and even if he allows it die of of a thousand cuts, a competent administrator could revive it; and he has shown precious little ability to get bills passed. About the only action he’s taken with lasting impact has been the appointment of Neil Gorsuch to the Supreme Court, and he only was given that chance by Mitch McConnell’s willingness to stamp his feet and hold his breath until a GOP president could make the nomination.

But with North Korea’s brazen tests, we’ve entered into a world where even the slightest misstep or misreading of the often subtle diplomatic signal could plunge the world into nuclear war.

And how does Il Douché react. Just as you’d expect: like a spoiled child, with bluster and threats. From the New York Times

“North Korea best not make any more threats to the United States,” Mr. Trump told reporters at his golf club in Bedminster, N.J. “They will be met with fire and fury like the world has never seen. He has been very threatening beyond a normal state and as I said they will be met with fire and fury and frankly power the likes of which this world has never seen before.”

Let’s unpack this for a second—North Korea has been making the kind of threats that normal states don’t. His response: make the kind of threats not made by a normal state. Our only hope is that the adults on both sides of the table (and there appear to be precious few in the White House) can get these two undisciplined  toddlers into a “time out” and deal with this before either one of them decides to show he can wear his big boy pants and hits the button. Otherwise, we’ll be looking for those old fallout shelter signs.

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About Steven Mirkin

Steven Mirkin’s diverse career has taken him from politics to pop culture to high art, offering him a front row seat to some of the most fascinating events and personalities of our time: writing speeches, fundraising appeals and campaign materials for Ed Koch, John Heinz and independent presidential candidate John B. Anderson; chronicling the punk/new wave scenes in New York and London; interviewing musicians such as Elton John, John Lydon and Buck Owens; profiling modern masters Julian Schnabel, Paul Schrader and Jonathan Safran Foer; and writing for TV shows including 21, The Chamber, Let's Make A Deal, and Rock Star: INXS. He currently edits Obitmagazine.com. View all posts by Steven Mirkin

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